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The Sleepy Floaty Isles of Dienes

“These fists were made for punching!”

Category: Corporate Bordello
Civil Rights:
Excellent
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Superb

Regional Influence: Eminence Grise

Location: Wysteria

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The Sleepy Floaty Isles of Dienes is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by a lonely baker with a fair hand, and renowned for its complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, intelligent population of 21.756 billion Dienesians are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, corrupt government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Education, Commerce, and Public Transport. It meets every day to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Hope. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 69%. A powerhouse of a private sector is led by the Book Publishing, Tourism, and Information Technology industries.

Citizens are bombarded with advertising from their compulsory miniature radios, Teddy Bears with strange deformities like three eyes and tentacles have been seen prancing through the countryside where industrial waste is dumped, Pinkerton agents are called in to forcibly break up white collar strikes, and conductors wield diamond-encrusted batons to fit in with their freshly gilded surroundings. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Dienes's national animal is the Teddy Bear, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, its national religion is watermelon juggling, and its currency is the Unicycle.

Dienes is ranked 35th in Wysteria and 1,432nd in the world for Largest Populations, with 21,756 Capita (millions).

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity: 2 days 1 hour ago

  • 1 day 18 hours ago: Dienes was reclassified from "New York Times Democracy" to "Corporate Bordello".
  • 1 day 18 hours ago: Following new legislation in Dienes, conductors wield diamond-encrusted batons to fit in with their freshly gilded surroundings.
  • 1 day 18 hours ago: Following new legislation in Dienes, Pinkerton agents are called in to forcibly break up white collar strikes.
  • 1 day 18 hours ago: Following new legislation in Dienes, Teddy Bears with strange deformities like three eyes and tentacles have been seen prancing through the countryside where industrial waste is dumped.
  • 1 day 18 hours ago: Following new legislation in Dienes, citizens are bombarded with advertising from their compulsory miniature radios.
  • 2 days 18 hours ago: Dienes was ranked in the Top 10% of the region for Most Subsidized Industry (last census: Top 5%).
  • 3 days 18 hours ago: Following new legislation in Dienes, the government pours millions of Unicycles into rehabilitation programs annually.
  • 3 days 18 hours ago: Following new legislation in Dienes, prosecutors routinely call transplant doctors as 'expert witnesses' in burglary cases.
  • 3 days 18 hours ago: Following new legislation in Dienes, senior citizens can usually be found doing heavy manual labour.
  • 3 days 18 hours ago: Following new legislation in Dienes, several citizens have complained about scientists abducting their pets for experimentation.

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by Max Barry

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