The Corporatocracy of
Corporate Bordello

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How did the CROF come into existence anyway? - History Document 1

CROF's history starts in France in the 14th century, at the height of the Black Death. France's population was on a steady decline, and panicked masses were looking for something to pin the blame on. Some blamed the devil, others blamed books, and still others blamed foreigners. A small group found themselves under ridicule, the hairiest of France's men and women were accused of spreading the disease, because their body hair resembled that of rats, a carrier of the plague. These men and women did have a disease, but it was not the plague; modern genome analysis reveals that the Black death activated a long recessive gene in certain member of the general populace. The gene was then expressed in their children, making them extremely hairy.

A small shaggy French group of outcasts soon formed outside the country, persuaded chased away by angry mobs, they left to find a new home. Through their wanderings they came upon the Casuari Islands, looked at each other, shrugged, and established a village. The other nations of the Islands ignored the Village of French Fuzzies (The official name), and the Fuzzies ignored them. Atleast, it was this way until the Village of French Fuzzies expanded too large for its resources to handle, then trade became a concern.

From here the story becomes more disjointed. Some individuals began to specialize in trading, and these traders were told to bring in just up to the amount of resources the village needed, no surplus was allowed because it required trading away a different resource. One day, known as Bourgeois Day, a certain trader went to trade with his favorite country in the Islands, The Nariwan Empire. On this particular day, the Nariwan trader gave the Fuzzy merchant more Furbies than 10 cows should have been able to buy; he told the merchant, "Your business with me is so consistent, that I give you a gift in appreciated of our relations." The merchant was thankful, but he did not include the Furbies in the batch he returned to the Village, because he knew they would force him to return it - instead he sold them to another Fuzzy trader. This was the first instance of profit, of the black market, and of Capitalism that had ever been seen in the future Republic. The trader passed on the lesson to his sons, who all became merchants themselves. Each of them took a small piece of their assigned product and sold it for profit.

Around the 18th century, razors began to leak into the Fuzzy market. Finally, a device that consistently and easily removed their excess hair, allowing them to overcome the shame they had grown so accustomed to towards foreigners. One of the trader's son saw a huge opportunity and negotiated with the Village Council to be in charge of all razor import and production, the council agreed because demand was magnitudes greater than supply. He began a campaign to give citizens free razor blades, all they had to do was spend time punching out razors from sheet metal to help curb the demand. He had created the first unspecialized, low-wage job for the commoner.

His company grew vast, nearly one quarter of the population was employed at his company, which soon rivaled the government in its size. His corporation's huge growth shielded other businesses from public attention, allowing hundreds of for profit businesses to enter the scene.

In homage to their hairy past, the Village of Fuzzy French renamed the now capitalist (and huge) nation to the Creature's Republic of France.
Corporations were merging, and splitting; they constantly fought the government for the attention of the general populace. That was until one elected legislator became weary of the tug-o-war for control of the Nation. He garnered enough support in the government to pass a bill outlawing Private Enterprise, and corporations were given an ultimatum; Disband or be absorbed into the government. The whole strategy was almost poetic in its beauty, being executed like a reverse Coup d'état. Chaos rained for nearly half a decade as the new enterprises found their places inside the governing body.

This created the CROF Government that rules today. Sleek and efficient like any Corporation, and driven by profit, the amalgamation became responsible for all citizens, who are it's workers. Because oppressed citizens are not very efficient, the Government is lenient on civil rights. A rotating board of directors is nominated by the Wealthy and government corporations, but voted in by Citizens.


by Max Barry

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