The Tout-Puissant Orchestre of Cotonou is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by the rythm with an even hand, and remarkable for its rampant corporate plagiarism, prohibition of alcohol, and parental licensing program. The hard-working population of 30.447 billion Cotonouans have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The minute, corrupt government, or what there is of one, is primarily concerned with Administration, although Education and Industry are also considered important, while Spirituality and Defense receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cotonou. The average income tax rate is 1.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Cotonouan economy, worth 561 trillion beats a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity. The industrial sector is mostly comprised of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, although the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 18,451 beats, with the richest citizens earning 5.2 times as much as the poorest.

The nation's prisons are touted as the best weight loss programs money can't buy, a niche industry catering to S&M enthusiasts has sprung up, a new generation of aquariumless hotels are being built under government supervision, and cheese lovers have a case of the bleus. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, probably because of the absence of a police force. Cotonou's national animal is the elephant, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Cotonou is ranked 293,831^st in the world and 11,305^th in Lazarus for Lowest Crime Rates, with 3 law-abiding acts per hour.