The Captains of Cappado is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Captain Cappado with an even hand, and notable for its burgeoning wolf population. The quiet, industrious population of 23.073 billion Cappadoans have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Healthcare, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cappadona. The average income tax rate is 43.5%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The Cappadoan economy, worth 570 trillion Euros a year, is quite specialized and dominated by the Soda Sales industry, with significant contributions from Pizza Delivery, Basket Weaving, and Cheese Exports. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 24,741 Euros, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.9 times as much as the poorest.

CDs are regularly copy-protected, Cappado's children are widely acknowledged as the most foul-mouthed in the region, corporations cut costs by taking away safety-features on their products, and the nation refuses to discard its increasingly useless penny. Crime is relatively low, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Cappado's national animal is the wolf, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Cappadoism.

Cappado is ranked 199,185^th in the world and 1^st in The Topaz Fists for Lowest Crime Rates, with 56.75 law-abiding acts per hour.