The Kingdom of Cainesland is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by The Federal Council with an even hand, and remarkable for its keen interest in outer space, frequent executions, and avant-garde cinema. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 21.954 billion Caineslandians are prohibited from doing almost everything except voting, which they do timidly and conservatively.

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, corrupt, socially-minded government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Environment, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cainesland City. The average income tax rate is 95.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Caineslandian economy, worth a remarkable 2,213 trillion gold coins a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is solely comprised of the Information Technology industry. Average income is an impressive 100,846 gold coins, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.3 times as much as the poorest.

No one is quite sure what many government officials look like, atheists on vacation find a major religion's scriptures make useful doorstops, male friends are often accompanied by a female relative in order to prove their 'straightness', and criminals and college students are taking an interest in the government's new weed-killing program. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Cainesland's national animal is the Tiger, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is a major religion.

Cainesland is ranked 4,220^th in the world and 239^th in Lazarus for Lowest Crime Rates, with 120.68 law-abiding acts per hour.