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The Cabin in the Woods of Blazing Samaritan

“We don't need a stinkin' motto”

Category: Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
Civil Rights:
Excellent
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Some

Regional Influence: Vassal

Location: The East Pacific

OverviewPeopleGovernmentEconomyTrendAnalysis

The Cabin in the Woods of Blazing Samaritan is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by Giant Hand with an even hand, and notable for its complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 14.054 billion Blazing Samaritanites have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Education, and the Environment. It meets every day to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Necronomicon City. Income tax is unheard of. A powerhouse of a private sector is dominated by the Book Publishing industry.

Scientists regularly clone human beings for research purposes, citizens are allowed to rise or fall based on their own merits, it is a common belief that a sport isn't sport if there are no decapitations, and elections have recently been reintroduced to Blazing Samaritan. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Blazing Samaritan's national animal is the Evil Unicorn, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, its national religion is Ventriloquism, and its currency is the Zombie Arm.

Blazing Samaritan is ranked 4,225th in The East Pacific and 118,058th in the world for Largest Trout Fishing Sector, scoring -11 on the Nemo Depletion Efficiency Index.

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity: 14 hours ago

  • 14 hours ago: Blazing Samaritan was reclassified from "Father Knows Best State" to "Inoffensive Centrist Democracy".
  • 14 hours ago: Following new legislation in Blazing Samaritan, elections have recently been reintroduced to Blazing Samaritan.
  • 14 hours ago: Following new legislation in Blazing Samaritan, it is a common belief that a sport isn't sport if there are no decapitations.
  • 14 hours ago: Following new legislation in Blazing Samaritan, citizens are allowed to rise or fall based on their own merits.
  • 14 hours ago: Following new legislation in Blazing Samaritan, scientists regularly clone human beings for research purposes.
  • 14 hours ago: Blazing Samaritan endorsed The Free Land of Solskygge.
  • 5 days ago: Following new legislation in Blazing Samaritan, motorists must pay to enter inner-cities during peak hours.
  • 5 days ago: Following new legislation in Blazing Samaritan, politicians constantly ring their voters to remind them how good a job they're doing.
  • 6 days ago: Following new legislation in Blazing Samaritan, dozens of additional foreign policy specialists have been sent to the country's WA Mission.
  • 6 days ago: Following new legislation in Blazing Samaritan, the government is spending millions on renovating the public transportation system.

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by Max Barry

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