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The Republic of Aquilonia-Caithness

“Mira la Soledad”

Category: Corrupt Dictatorship
Civil Rights:
Some
Economy:
Imploded
Political Freedoms:
Few

Regional Influence: Superpower

Location: Katasia

OverviewPeopleGovernmentEconomyTrendAnalysis

The Republic of Aquilonia-Caithness is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Leader with an iron fist, and notable for its sprawling nuclear power plants. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 24.965 billion Aquilonia-Caithnessians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

There is no government in the normal sense of the word; however, a small group of community-minded, corrupt individuals juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Defence, and the Environment. It meets every day to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Aquilonia-Caithness City. Income tax is unheard of. The private sector is almost wholly made up of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, although the government is looking at stamping this out.

Local executives are seen on the corner with cardboard signs reading "will oppress the masses for food", the people are famous throughout the region for their bleached-white teeth, fewer people are bathing as citizens must show ration stamps before they can turn on their faucets, and crime suspects are forced to submit to blood testing. Crime -- especially youth-related -- is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force. Aquilonia-Caithness's national animal is the phoenix, which is also the nation's favorite main course, its national religion is a major religion, and its currency is the flayed chinchilla skin.

Aquilonia-Caithness is ranked 1st in Katasia and 1,430th in the world for Highest Drug Use, scoring 426 on the Pineapple Fondness Rating.

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity: 17 hours ago

  • 7 hours ago: Following new legislation in Aquilonia-Caithness, crime suspects are forced to submit to blood testing.
  • 1 day 7 hours ago: Following new legislation in Aquilonia-Caithness, fewer people are bathing as citizens must show ration stamps before they can turn on their faucets.
  • 2 days 7 hours ago: Following new legislation in Aquilonia-Caithness, the people are famous throughout the region for their bleached-white teeth.
  • 2 days 7 hours ago: Following new legislation in Aquilonia-Caithness, local executives are seen on the corner with cardboard signs reading "will oppress the masses for food".
  • 2 days 7 hours ago: Following new legislation in Aquilonia-Caithness, Aquilonia-Caithness's children are widely acknowledged as the most foul-mouthed in the region.
  • 4 days ago: Following new legislation in Aquilonia-Caithness, citizens who leave the country are officially classed as traitors.
  • 4 days ago: Following new legislation in Aquilonia-Caithness, politicians constantly ring their voters to remind them how good a job they're doing.
  • 5 days ago: Following new legislation in Aquilonia-Caithness, euthanasia is legal.
  • 6 days ago: Following new legislation in Aquilonia-Caithness, pharmacies close down as medicinal drugs are sold freely by the government.
  • 6 days ago: Following new legislation in Aquilonia-Caithness, students and teachers are regularly stopped and searched for symbols of religious affiliation before class.

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by Max Barry

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