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The Republic of Aquilonia-Caithness

“Mira la Soledad”

Category: Father Knows Best State
Civil Rights:
Some
Economy:
Imploded
Political Freedoms:
Rare

Regional Influence: Superpower

Location: Katasia

OverviewPeopleGovernmentEconomyTrendAnalysis

The Republic of Aquilonia-Caithness is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Leader with an iron fist, and renowned for its parental licensing program. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 25.168 billion Aquilonia-Caithnessians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

There is no government in the normal sense of the word; however, a small group of community-minded, corrupt individuals juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Defence, and the Environment. It meets every day to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Aquilonia-Caithness City. Income tax is unheard of. The private sector is almost wholly made up of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, although the government is looking at stamping this out.

Birth rates have hit an all-time low, inter-species marriages are ignored by the government, a large-scale revitalization of the education system is underway, and record sales of 'child-whacking sticks' have been reported. Crime -- especially youth-related -- is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force. Aquilonia-Caithness's national animal is the phoenix, which is also the nation's favorite main course, its national religion is a major religion, and its currency is the flayed chinchilla skin.

Aquilonia-Caithness is ranked 3rd in Katasia and 8,110th in the world for Highest Police Ratios, scoring 143 on the Orwell Orderliness Index.

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity: 5 hours ago

  • 6 hours ago: Aquilonia-Caithness was reclassified from "Iron Fist Consumerists" to "Father Knows Best State".
  • 6 hours ago: Following new legislation in Aquilonia-Caithness, record sales of 'child-whacking sticks' have been reported.
  • 18 hours ago: Following new legislation in Aquilonia-Caithness, a large-scale revitalization of the education system is underway.
  • 18 hours ago: Following new legislation in Aquilonia-Caithness, inter-species marriages are ignored by the government.
  • 1 day 18 hours ago: Following new legislation in Aquilonia-Caithness, birth rates have hit an all-time low.
  • 3 days 18 hours ago: Following new legislation in Aquilonia-Caithness, scenic mountain valleys are flooded with water as damming projects get underway.
  • 3 days 18 hours ago: Following new legislation in Aquilonia-Caithness, abortions are routinely performed in Aquilonia-Caithness's hospitals.
  • 4 days ago: Following new legislation in Aquilonia-Caithness, public nudity is compulsory.
  • 5 days ago: Following new legislation in Aquilonia-Caithness, the dead are minced up and sold to people in burger form.
  • 5 days ago: Following new legislation in Aquilonia-Caithness, the government has hired out-of-work fashion designers to design purses for men.

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by Max Barry

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